UNITY CANDLE CEREMONY

Wedding ceremonies today often include special parts, such as the lighting of the unity candle. It is not really clear as to when this addition started in ceremonies. Most likely back 40 plus years.  But it is growing in popularity.

A set up using very simple holders and allowing space for a floral arrangement on the table.

The set up for the ceremony includes the placing of two tapers and one larger candle on a table in the ceremony area. It can be as ornate or simple as the bride desires. While there are unity candle holders and sets for sale in most bridal stores or other locations, creativity can also be used to have a unique set of holders.

This was a set up we did for a ceremony, using one of our unique candle holder sets.

Unity candle ceremonies symbolize the joining of two – the bride and groom – becoming united into one family. The two tapers are lit at the beginning of the ceremony by the mothers of the couple, or by someone very special if the mother is not available. The two mothers go to the table and light the tapers, putting them back in the holders where they will remain until the couple’s part.

A sample of the holder you find in stores.

At the time in the ceremony – usually designated by the officiant – the couple will move to the table. A prayer and a special song are usually incorporated here to help place emphasis on the value of this part of the ceremony. The bride and groom pick up the taper that was lit by their mother, and place their candles together to light the large middle candle. After the lighting of the main candle, the bride and groom can do one of two things – leave their tapers lit and place in holder, or blow out the flame of the taper and put the taper back in the holder. Some couples also take this time to have a moment of silence together thinking about their life together, a song that means something special to the couple.

The symbolism of leaving the tapers lit is – they have become one, but also remain two separate individuals. The blowing out of the tapers can mean that they are becoming one and leaving the old ways behind. It is up to the couple and their officiant.

Unity candles are often kept and displayed in the couple’s home. Some re-lit the candle each anniversary as a re-commitment to their life together.

Even though the use of unity candles in the ceremony is becoming wide-spread it is not used in all ceremonies and is prohibited by some churches, such as the Catholic faith. I find it used more in non-denominational ceremonies, but have also had it used in some protestant churches. You should always ask the minister of the church if this ceremony is allowed, and if they have special instructions for the ceremony.

It is used at both indoor ceremonies and some outdoor weddings. It is often difficult though to keep the flames lit due to winds outside. If you are going to use it outdoors, carefully plan the location of the table it will be on so that it will not be exposed to winds. Some people use hurricane covers for the candles outside – but they too can be blown over by the wind. So plan carefully.
Another tip for the table, place a clear piece of glass under the candle holder to save your tablecloth from candle drips.
More to come on some additions to ceremonies to help make your wedding “Unique & Yours”, next we will look at sand ceremonies and their popularity.
Happy planning!